Posted in ChaosMen2 years, 10 months ago at 10:20 am
(52 votes, average: 3.63 out of 5)
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Gods help us, it’s another frakking ChaosMen Edge video. This time, it’s with our old friend Chance. And believe me, that doesn’t change a thing. These frakking Edge videos are so damn bizarre. Laced between those stupid heartbeats, Bryan Ockert starts shoving a giant pink dildo into Chance’s mouth. Now what the frak is the chance of that happening? Of course, after that, it’s the usual stroking, age spots, the waning hairicane and red-faced boss-administered blowjobs. Oh gods, I’m watching it as we speak and here comes that frakking dildo again. Bryan is really trying to shove it in Chance’s ass. But, it won’t go, it’s too big. Oh wait, nevermind, it’s in. I really can’t watch much more of this and I’m skipping ahead. I see Bryan’s head speed by, buried in Chance’s ass, that stupid pink dildo, more sucking, Chance yanking on Bryan’s dick and Bryan cumming. Yes, really. On to Chance’s cumshot, it’s good. Big, runny and in Bryan’s eye. Now, what’s the chance of that? Click here to find out!
The last time I saw ChaosMen’s Zane, his name was Todd and he was getting fucked by Corbin Fisher’s Cade. Which, by the way, was a very hot video.
So, I was a bit surprised to see Todd, I mean Zane, appear on ChaosMen in an “Edge” video. Yes, exactly, one of those videos. And this one is annoying as ever. From the stupid overlaid heart beat sound effect, the blind fold, the headphones, his dick, his hair and everything else – I hate it all. It’s avant-garde camel shit and it sucks.
Fortunately, Zane’s appeal manages to rise above the genius editing that is “Edge”. Even while cringing, I was still able to admire his big muscular body and thick Texan cock. I even liked his NAVY anchor tattoo on his left shoulder.
This video raises a few important questions. First, why the fuck did you go from being fucked by Cade to getting sucked by the old maid? And second, do you consider it a miracle that you stayed hard during your “Edge” video?
Video of Zane (a.k.a. Todd) blindfolded and tied naked to a chair on ChaosMen
The show was a complete circus. And why wouldn’t it be? As an interviewer, Tyra is a halfwit goof who claws her way through interviews. So, yeah ex-sandwich maker Kurt Wild, JetSet Men’s Aaron James and former Straight College Men’s Dean Coxx, it makes total sense to go on her campy national TV show while you attempt to justify being gay-for-pay to an audience that is largely unfamiliar with the phrase and was sitting in Maury’s audience just hours earlier encouraging a couple of GLBT Chinese ape rabbit twins to rip each others eyes out. And let’s not forget, this is the Tyra you’ll be interviewed by:
But, the worst part of Tyra Banks’s gay-for-pay show was that our porn star friends were neither very candid nor clear. Kurt was the worst. His cringe inducing answers are best described as dumb and dumber. His explanations about his gay-for-pay label were hopelessly perplexing and unbelievable. And it certainly didn’t help that his strange head rubbing and fidgeting made him look guilty of something terrible. Oh and, the highlight of course was where he epitomized his conundrum by correcting Tyra about how his girlfriend was actually his wife. Only moments later to correct himself by saying that she was actually his fiancée. Good one Kurt, but, I like you more when the things coming out of your mouth sound more like this:
On the other hand, Aaron James and Dean Coxx weren’t as bad, but not by much. Dean was more candid, but was left dashed after his bisexual stripper girlfriend was more so. And Aaron, well, he was okay, but fell apart quickly, looking defensive. And then his mom stood up. Oy vey!
If only they had formulated intelligent, brief and 96% honest answers before going on the show and watched Frost Nixon. Bullshit was flying everywhere, answers were convoluted and by the end, nothing effective had been said. For example, I would have said, “Lookey here Tyrell, we’s all have a price <head slide>, mmm… hmmm…. So, while yo’ rich bitch model ass mays be esspennssive, all black labels nnn…. shit, I’z beeezz alll Walmart affartable. See, I just cheap, das all you microphone holdin’ ho. <head slide, eyes lock on Tyra> Ooohs, bitcjj I gonee rip yo’ damn weave outta yo’ hett… <lunge towards Tyra and grab hair, yank and then scream> Heelelpp! Trya try’in tah killl me! Cochran! Com’ on! I sue you bitch! Sue you! I be rich! RICH!”
Anyway, towards the end, the sideshow started. A group of straight gay bar tenders, the bearded lady and trio of anti gay-for-pay Povich’esque nobodys showed up. The most obnoxious being Sean Kennedy, who is an editor with the Advocate and apparently, the leader of the “Gay KK” movement. This puny little girl was rambling on about how gay-for-pay pornstars were bad for the community and straight guys shouldn’t work in gay bars. Meanwhile, he’s jerked to heaps of gay-for-pay porn and would suck that straight bar tending cock in the blink of an eye. Nothing worse than a hypocrite, or, a queen in denial.
Speaking of which, I almost forgot about Matt Sanchez, a.k.a Rod Majors a.k.a Pierre LaBranche. Matt is a former Marine, pornstar and is now a writer, journalist, Marine Corps reservist, singer, songwriter and dancer. On the show, he warned the younger, less hung and less Puerto Rican pornstars that their gay-for-pay paydays will catch up with them in the future. Apparently, Anne Coulter wasn’t too happy about his last video, “Touched by an Anal”.
Personally, I’m not convinced. I mean, sure, it’s bad if you later end up in a room where Anne Coulter just finished screaming “faggot”, but, what doofus does that? On the other hand, if you end up working at Subway, it doesn’t matter. Oh wait, ok, nevermind, scratch that. How about a coal worker? Eh, hmmm… no, I can see the mining jokes getting annoying. Hmm.. I give up. But, I do get what Matt was getting at. Here is my interpretation of it: Hot studs and bitches, if you’re thinking about becoming a pornstar and have plans to cover it up in the future, don’t forget the sex change.
Perhaps I’m queer, but can’t you suck cock and not be a flaming lunatic? Cock is a private enterprise. The only thing others need to be convinced of is to mind their own fucking business. You don’t shit on my lawn, and I won’t slash your tires. And the last thing I want is some fruit running around demanding the back of the bus be reserved for cock smokers.
Pornstars, focus on fucking. Fags and fans, focus on them. And for the rest of you, unless you click here, get the frack out.
Watch Tyra Banks’s Gay-For-Pay Show
Here are 5 YouTube video clips of the Tyra Banks gay-for-pay interview. Thanks Tyra!
Share Tyra Banks’s Cirque Du Gay-for-pay post
Ok, we’re ghetto, so to share this gay-for-pay post, copy the post URL below and then spread it like the flu it’s hot. You can also use the ‘ShareThis’ link beneath the title of this post above.
Exclusive gay-for-pay porn directories exposing the lifestyles of the Gay-For-Pay!
ChaosMen’s RAW video of Jayce & Teague sounded good. They bareback in their video and Teague eats his own cum off of Jacye’s hole. So, I downloaded the video and watched.
Where do I begin? Let’s start with Teague, who has the worst haircut I’ve ever seen, some crappy Italian gay-beard and those grungy fairy wings inked onto his back. At least Jayce was doing something for me. Barney crapped on his ass though.
The video was supposed to be filled with amazing energy and chemistry. Instead, I saw hideous tattoos, bad hair and where Gorbachev’s head crashed into Jayce’s ass. And before you start thinking I hate tattoos, you’re right, I do.
Why the fuck would you take a hot body and start pumping ink into it like some retarded 3-year-old? Does that make any fucking sense? That guy in the tattoo parlor isn’t exactly Da Vinci my friend.
Anyway, back to cocks at ChaosMen. While I didn’t love the whole glory hole and pissing shit. Barett had one hell of a cock. Huge and shapely. If you can stomach Tris, take a look.
For those of you who watched ChaosMen’s Connor and Degan video and liked it, I have a question for you. Can you please explain what pleasures are to be had from watching burnt hairy old birds covered in tattoos fuck?
Jebidiah from ChaosMen has a really big dick. Which means, his girlfriend has a really big vagina. Isn’t it funny how it’s hot for Jebidiah’s sexual organ to be huge, but Elly May’s gigantic pussy is just disgusting.
What about a big asshole? Is that hot? Because Jebidiah said he just recently had anal sex with Elly May for the first time.
Click here to see what it takes to get your own big asshole, and pussy, if you have one.
For more of Jebidiah’s vagina stretcher, checkout his four other shirtless and nude galleries (1, 2, 3 & 4) along with his two videos below as pornstar alias Brett Fyre on Next Door Male:
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 3 months ago at 10:18 pm
(22 votes, average: 4.41 out of 5)
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We caught ChaosMen’s Sebastian in the middle of a government cover-up. However, while we would normally fight to stop the concealment of the truth, in this case, we told Sebastian it was okay. Actually, we asked him if he could just strike that pose permanently. Nice fucking cock btw.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 3 months ago at 10:08 pm
(32 votes, average: 4.28 out of 5)
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ChaosMen’s Jagger has a rat’s nest on his head and is part Asian. Knowing this, you can imagine how surprised we were to hear him speak English and see his considerably sized cock. On the other hand, we weren’t surprised to see that rat’s nest on his head.
What I like most about Jagger is his sexry armond eyes, messry hair, rong shinry cock, ugry tattroos and that he’s arways smiring. There’s rots to rove about Jagger, and I only hope your ugry racial stereotypers don’t prevent roo from cricking here and subscribering, sheariousree.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 3 months ago at 11:02 pm
(25 votes, average: 4.60 out of 5)
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If it wasn’t for the fact that Chance blows a rewind-worthy load, I would have skipped blogging about this video. These Serviced videos are so traumatizing that I’m struggling to roast them. In fact, as you can see, I couldn’t even begin to roast this one.
If you can come up with something funny, post it in the comments!
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 4 months ago at 3:07 am
(38 votes, average: 4.03 out of 5)
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ChaosMen’s Chance is 20, 5’8″, loves Hispanic girls, has a girlfriend and no, he’s not cross-eyed. His friend pushed him to do porn, along with the encouragement of his girlfriend. In fact, she wants the video. Sounds like they really want the best for him.
Chance has big meaty balls, a nice cock and can shoot for a living. When asked what he likes to do with girls, he said he likes to get straight to the point and fuck ‘em. No “pussy footin’ around”. Yeah, well, good for you, because most straight girls don’t like men standing in their vagina.
Most of the solo video honestly was crap. Watching someone masturbate gets boring fast, and throwing in a bazillion angles doesn’t make it any better. Fortunately for this video, Chance is a shooter and his cumshot was impressive. Just skip towards the end and you’ll be fine.
And, hey, it’s Chance’s theme song. It features two upcoming models from ChaosMen. Something to look forward to! Love the plastic pony, I want one.
In the video at ChaosMen, Vance blinks like a mofo. It’s odd, but hot.
Exclusive NSG porn parody of Vance’s blinkgasms during his inteview
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Has Vance appeared at any other sites besides Sean Cody?
Anyway, so the following is one of my favorite scenes from the movie Airplane!. It’s the second slap from Leslie Nelson that really makes it priceless. Like he figures he should give her one for the road. Classic scene for a classic movie.
Sean Cody’s Evan is fresh out of the Marines. He was a combat air traffic controller, and one hell of a cute one at that. Surprisingly, he’s gay, loves it doggie style, reverse cowboy and is the boyfriend of the interviewer at Sean Cody! Lucky bastard.
Seriously, nice cock and all, but the whole “Edge” video concept is freaking me out. The overlaid heartbeat, creepy sounds and jumpy cuts are just not sexy. How is anyone supposed to get an erection when they’re waiting for the fucking Grudge girl to crawl out of their monitor? On top of that, while Christine’s yanking on Dalton’s cock, she’s fixated on the damn thing like a cat about to kill a bird. Then the abrupt return of that scary music makes me think she’s going to lose it and go all crazy gouging her eyes out with his penis. Soooo, fucking, scary. Oh and, would it kill you to wear a god damn hat?
But, I’m supposed to be selling this stuff, so let me say something nice. Okay, so, first off, Dalton is hot. Yeah, he’s not ripped, facially stunning or monstrously hung, but he’s nonetheless attractive. Maybe it’s the dildump, or perhaps it’s his laid-back and compliant persona. Appealing because we all see that if we catch him in Walmart, we put that shitty black eye mask over his eyes and he’ll let us do whatever the hell we want to him. And when we’re done, he’ll kill us.
Exclusive NSG porn parody of Dalton’s dildump
So, anyway, crazy “Edge” crap aside, the Dalton video is pretty hot. But, for the next “Edge” video, it’s Christine’s turn to wear the mask permanently.
Now, on another note, but related to our Phantom of the Opera theme, and for our entertainment, may we present this streaming pile of crap:
This music video sucks. Does she know she’s not in the shower? Sounds like a dying goose. The guy is worse, like one big screaming fart. Then the woman starts to screech something awful, and the guy hates it, so he starts to yell-sing back at her. This is definitely what hell sounds like.
Anyway, obviously, this woman cut a deal with Satan, because, the audience was cheering. Only the devil could force people to cheer and clap for that shit. And, if you listen closely, they actually scream bloody horror at first, then they clap. See, it’s the bloody devil.
Not convinced? Okay, after she finishes shrieking, she says “meatballs”. That was the *deal*. At the end of her ghastly drag show she was supposed to say “meatballs”, because it’s the magic word. And she did. She said “meatballs”.
Just in case you liked it, the group’s name is “Nightwish and Tarja Turunen”. If Google isn’t returning any results, try their English name, “Deathwish and Turd Pile”. If that doesn’t work, try their other name: “crap”.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 5 months ago at 9:34 pm
(43 votes, average: 4.47 out of 5)
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ChaosMen’s Chaz is cute and hung, but what you’ll like most about him is that he’s a shooter. In his video, his cumshot travels a good 4-5 feet. After cumming, Bryan Ockert asks Chaz if he usually shoots so far. He with “Umm… sometimes, but it’s usually in my girlfriends mouth.” LOL, nice Chaz, thanks for telling the Internet that your girlfriend has fake titties and swallows like a hatchling.
If you really like Chaz, you’re in luck. His model application to ChaosMen started with an e-mail that included a picture and this line:
“I need to do a video now! Rent is due!”
Not exactly the circumstances one would hope a pornstar would be born under, but, whatever. Check back again next month, when the rent’s due again. In the meantime, loop that cumshot.
One last thing, checkout Chaz’s pubes. He trimmed them into a v-shape. Makes his cock look like it has eye brows, or horns. LOL, who the fuck does that!?
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 5 months ago at 3:01 am
(23 votes, average: 4.30 out of 5)
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In the comments of Lansing’s earlier post, Keith pointed out that there is a lot of sucking going on at Naked Straight Guys today. Yes, it is true, we did not actually watch all of Lansing’s video. To our defense, there was a lot of sucking going on. Anyway, it’s a shame easily corrected. We re-played the video and watched for the best part, Lansing’s spectacular cumshot.
Lansing shoots for show, he really does. Powerful geysers of cum rocketed from his cock as he clenched forward in bliss. With cum raining down around him, he finished off with spouting scattered showers of glistening man-sap. This is of course overly dramatic, but, you get the point, it was hot.
Now, if you’d stop hassling the monkey for a second, you can see more by clicking here.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 5 months ago at 8:24 pm
(23 votes, average: 4.48 out of 5)
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Lansing from ChaosMen has a hot ass. It’s plump and bubbly. For this, we’ll be nice. No jokes, insults or snarky stabs. Just for this one time, you can have your wood on the rocks while you stare stupidly gawk at Lance’s photos and video.
Though, let’s not forget that this miracle won’t continue forever. We all know that the “Serviced” videos are soon to return. It’s inevitable, just like the mess you’re soon to make, but enjoy!
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 5 months ago at 11:41 pm
(24 votes, average: 4.29 out of 5)
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I don’t know what’s more amazing, Stash & Teo fucking flying, or that ChaosMen’s latest update isn’t one of those traumatic “Serviced” videos. It’s a real rare treat when Bryan Ockert isn’t slobber sucking the hell out of a model and then jerking them off until they cum in a bizzare and really uncomfortable climax. Seriously, much more, and ChaosMen will be up there with “2 Girls 1 Cup”. Or, worse, Jake Cruise.
Nasty spitting out of the way on muah part, this is a really hot flip-flop fuck video. Stash is definitely worth the cash, and Teo is good for at least an I.O.U.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 8 months ago at 8:51 pm
(33 votes, average: 4.48 out of 5)
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Haven’t seen the video, but Gram from ChaosMen looks interesting. Ordinary straight pussy-puncher, with an unusual jack off technique and who believes “a mouth is a mouth”.
Eh, come again? Are you serious? Cats have mouths.
NSG Pole Poll: That said, we’re all dying to know something about you. At this very moment, are you hard? Be naughty and pop in an answer in the pole poll below.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 9 months ago at 11:15 pm
(21 votes, average: 2.95 out of 5)
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Bryan, we really do love you, but please, every time you do this, our fairy rods go limp. This is like putting Bambi and a famished Lion King in the same scene. It’s just not cute. You’re the guy who works on my car and just makes things worse. So please, we beg you, stop servicing them. If the guys break down, lose control, run into a pump, have a fender bender, crash into each other, explode or just simply dump their fluids, just let them. Really, enough with the sucking, but don’t forget, off camera, we still love you!
To have Bryan stop sucking Dalton and the rest of his model’s cocks, click here to register as a ChaosMen subscriber with your credit card and then send a message to your favorite pornographer and tell him to take a breather.
Posted in ChaosMen3 years, 9 months ago at 9:26 am
(17 votes, average: 3.82 out of 5)
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ChaosMen’s Slade has European super cock. It’s big, thick, knobby and scary flexible. The damn thing can just about do a 180 somersault right into his own asshole. The ability to fuck oneself boggles my mind. I mean, your the top and the bottom. That’s just crazy. Reminds me of a Möbius strip. Which, has inspired me to coin a new term:
Möbius Fuck(pronounced meɪbiəs): To fuck oneself in the ass with one’s own cock.
Posted in ChaosMen4 years, 2 months ago at 3:53 pm
(7 votes, average: 3.86 out of 5)
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Clint is a very interesting straight guy. He’s 19-years-old, good-looking and during Chaosmen’s photoshoot he told site owner Bryan Ockert that he was still a virgin. He says he wants to save that one special thing for his future wife. But until that day comes, he’s satisfied with just receiving head for now.
Posted in ChaosMen4 years, 3 months ago at 1:28 pm
(7 votes, average: 3.57 out of 5)
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Many of you may know Phenix Saint from his appearances on other sites such as Amateur Straight Guys, Mike Hancock and many others. Well this week his latest video is on Bryan Ockert’s ChaosMen.
Recently, Bryan has been looking for models who had the seduction skills to break in other straight guys. After talking to Phenix about doing an Edge video, Bryan decided he was the perfect guy for the job.
Posted in ChaosMen4 years, 4 months ago at 7:08 pm
(8 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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Jag is Rocco‘s best friend. Rocco had such a great time filming with site owner, Bryan Ockert, that when he came back to get blown by Race, he brought Jag along with him.
(52 votes, average: 3.63 out of 5)
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